put your lights on.

I miss this so much

I miss how he rolled my cigarette and then his own

no matter that he put the filter on the other side

he rolled the little paper round his fingers and talked about The Change.

I licked my lips and light it up.

We often shared just one

because we were out and we didn’t have no money.

He licked the filter too much which made me mad

but he just smiled and told me how pretty I was.

He always slept on the outer side in bed;

so that I don’t fall

in the abyss of my dreams.

He liked sleeping with the curtains open

so that he could hear the stars.

I poked him a little when he started snoring.

And in the mornings he woke up before me and told me he loved me.

* * *

It’s nice to be loved,

But to just hear it –

It’s not enough.

You have to see it.

And sometimes you just have to share a cigarette

and an uncomfortable bed

       to feel it.

V.